I want to listen to you breathe

I don’t really have much to say.
Actually, I do.
I’m depressed at the moment and I don’t know why. I’m listening to sad, soft music. I just want to be quiet and think. Either that or softly talk to someone who understands me perfectly.
I don’t want to think about sex. I don’t want to think about relationships, or lust, or perfection, or what I can do to make anything or everything better.
I just want to be held. Close, against someone’s heart. Someone who I know wants to hold me the same way. I want to stay there, sleepily forever, hearing the soft pounding of their heart and the slow breeze of their breath. I want to wrap my fingers around theirs. I want to lay my head on their shoulder.
I want everything to be the same again. I wish friends would stay friends, and secrets would stay secrets. I wish no one had to control anything.
I wish everyone would just let life flow with the air and the clouds and the water. I wish people would be content to live within their eternal bounds.
I wish I could sleep forever, and listen to the rain softly tapping on my window. I want the coolness of the air to flow over my face, to rustle my hair. I want to be lifted up in the cold wind, to be baptized in the sleet and in the frost.
I want the warmth of your hands in mine. I want you here so badly my soul aches.
And all I want to do is listen to you breathe.